You might not be, but the folks at Rapture Ready certainly are ready. According to their calculations using "the prophetic speedometer of end-time activity", we're well above the 145 level which is "fasten your seat belts" territory. Jesus is gonna come a-knocking any day now.

So, the end times a-cometh. I look at this as a positive. If the rapture is going to get rid of the kind of sanctimonious ass holes that put together sites like these and, not incidentally, put George Bush back in the White House, how can I not give it my blessing? Let them rot together in heaven. I feel "blessed" to consider myself among the unsaved.

I absolutely love the FAQ where you can find answers to such burning questions as: Are angels real? Angels are absolutely real (fuckin' A). Is the pope the antichrist? Nope. The antichrist will be a Jew (those Jews!). Is the devil working overtime? You bet your sweet tuchus he is. Should a woman work outside the home? Good god NO.

This whole thing wouldn't bother me so much except people like Todd Strandberg (the author of this crap) perpetuate the anti-semitism that it inherent in the new testament. I've discussed this evangelical christian obsession with murdering Jews before. The big problem is there is a serious disconnect between reality and what is written in the bible. Most honest people know that the bible is a book made up largely of parables, but also includes myths that form the central core of the religion, the sine qua non, if you will. Jesus died for your sins. The virgin birth. Loafs. Fishes. Wine. Water. The Resurrection. You get the point. Where would Christianity be without these things? If Jesus is just a wise (Jewish) man looking out for the poor, where does that leave the religion? The apostles had to construct a grandiose mythology around Jesus to make him palatable to converts. The fact the new testament is built around a framework of historical fact, real people (e.g. Pontius Pilate, Caesar, Jesus) and real places (e.g., Sea of Galilee, Bethlehem, Jerusalem, etc.) makes it all too easy for delusional Christians to take the entire book literally.

As for the Book of Revelation on which Rapture Ready is built, I look at it as the ultimate boogeyman. It's the evangelical equivalent to "don't masturbate or your palms with grow hair". Better get your spiritual check book in balance or you'll be left behind with the rest of the world's sinners. It's complete and utter excrement.